So You Ballsy, huh?

Recently, some guy from some college went "ballsy" on his resume, and BAM! Job offers!

Good for him. But how does that really work in normal life though? Resumes get tossed or overlooked for whatever reason. I get it, hundreds of people trying to fill a couple of positions and a lot will get the boot. A lot of people get rejected. Thats a lot of time searching for the "right" candidate with a piece of paper and words doing the talking for them.

So, if someone else were to take that risk, not make things sounds good or whatever, would they get the same treatment? Or just get their resume tossed in the can instead? Will more companies start looking for this sort of thing? But then things will start to get very monotonous and drab because EVERYONE trying to be "trendy" with their resume. (this is going beyond networking I am assuming too, just resume/cover letter submissions.)

Messages come to me in my life with this sort of thing:
 "Be yourself!" But not really, lol.
 "Believe in yourself!" But not too much. Don't want to seem like a cocky bastard or whatever.
 "Put this on your resume!" Nah... maybe not. Irrelevant shit.
 "This will make you seem interesting!" Or just weird.

I did. Maybe I am not being "ballsy" enough. Or not making things seem that interesting. But, this is for normal people life. Not anything eccentric or artsy. Not companies that will care if I can make content for Youtube or a blog, or draw a pretty picture. (maybe I should be my weirdo self and find these places out or something that would appreciate this!.......)

Even for things eccentric or artsy, I feel that things just don't go "right". Indian guy looking for an assistant, thinks I'm Italian because of my name and the way I sound on the phone, sounds disappointed upon hearing I'm Black.
Try to fit in like its fuckin high school or something with people totally out of my comfort/economic/status zones, and it backfires in my face.

But I keep smiling away, and try to! (imagine eye twitching too, like in animes or something)

I get it, rejection is part of the process. Eventually something will come through. Things don't happen overnight. They wanna see if you will crumble and give up. Eventually it will be the other way around and I will be the one making the choices. Keep truckin. The universe will work itself out. I can laugh about this stuff when I am 30 or 40... But...

wtf. Am I not supposed to do what they say or what I read or something? I took those classes on how to speak to people better and network and listened to what some people had to say to try to do better in situations I am not familiar in and level up on my skills and when I practice some of it.... I feel naive... especially for concentrating more on portfolio pieces. Humans can be so damn confusing sometimes!

I don't want to jinx myself for the future as I am getting sabotaged anyway, but IDK. Normal life, reality.... just kinda sucks up my energy right now and makes no sense, and its tiring.
There is too much to do, too many ideas in my head swirling about, and I am aching.

I wonder if things would have been different if I went out of state for college or something? Left Chicago for a different city or leave the USA all together after graduating?  Or didn't act like myself in job interviews? Or sent out a wacky, ballsy resume to companies.... What if What if What if...

MAN! The possibilities of different paths that could have happened are endless!

In Alice in Wonderland terms... maybe I have to fall down a different rabbit hole for this to make sense or something.

/rant over.

Please enjoy my next post on hair and my newest Youtube tutorial in normal people hours.