Anti Latinx or poc hate is not tolerated here

You know that at a certain distance, you might recognize someone or not by their gait or body type? Or if you didn’t know some groups of people could be taller or shorter and all that or that there could be similarities etc??I had an experience with that once, and it backfired on me and I didn’t have a chance to explain or even apologize or get some sort of  clarification. Especially to the people that mattered the most to me. 

I recall seeing someone that I THOUGHT was a Hispanic student at my school (the ones I knew were built muscular and that’s what I knew and saw during that time in my life. ) I didn’t realize until later that the particular person weren’t Hispanic at all,but that did not deter me from wanting to get to know them. 

I thought “oh! Didn’t know. (Moving on, new info acquired❣️),” and that person didn’t fit a certain mold (or stereotype either.) That helped me change my view on that, and I didn’t think that mistaking them for hispanic was a bad thing. When I started to have Latino friends I WAS made aware that you shouldn’t mix up the different Latino cultures/races and was thankful for that despite only knowing Mexican students in a class. 

I even brought it up when me and the male individual I mistook as Hispanic started talking because I thought it was silly of me and it was like one of those “how did you meet moments”. I didn’t know that they would find it insulting later on (even though they would tell me that other Mexicans thought he was one of them as well and they liked that he could speak some Spanish which made him happy and I suppose feel included. 

After 2010/2011 or so til a current interview I had, with a lot of other things in the middle of that time -being an entrepreneur or trying, my moms cancer diagnosis and death, not trying to drop out of school or fail due to my moms health,and taking a loss from a relationship, people started to hint at that I didn’t like Mexicans or Latinx people or Spanish language. It wasn’t as prevelant as it is now , but I found it odd. 

I did have someone tell me something’s that I didn’t agree with regarding Latinx men in 2010 ish, and i wasn’t as verbal and pushy on telling them that I will NOT have someone as a friend etc in my life that held that view. I also was focused more on “(poc) gal/alt fashion is life” than blantant anti racism advocacy. 

I didnt understand the context at the time of a low key phrasing, and though me and a woman were not friends and tried to do business collabs, I noticed that people treated me differently, thinking we were besties because we took a couple of pix together. Or that someone else could have misconstrued my words to only cast me in a negative light when we were not a good fit for each other and I wanted to move on whether or not I’d be cast as the villain for moving on. 

My Latinx friends that I respected, and even wished I was as talented and entrepreneurial like they were started to view me differently despite me never disrespecting them or having body language that showed I didn’t like their language. I didn’t want to be depressed and stressed out and not enjoy their company or feel like the sad Debbie downer with them. I couldn’t even enjoy the family summertime lunch I was invited to because of all the rumors and things I thought I could deal with on my own. 

If I could go back in time, it would have been lovely to clarify to them what I meant and not have people and even hiring managers think that I find other languages offensive due to someone misconstruing what I said when I wasn’t rejecting them based on race or looks. It would have been great to have been given space to rectify the situation one on one with them than hearing a rumor that I didn’t know where it could have came from at the time. 

I have to do better at advocating for my brothers and sisters of various races. We are all individuals after all and stereotypes and generalizations are hurtful, dehumanizing and  lazy.